Blind folded.

Dear stranger,
I guess I've no idea who you're , who am I. So if somehow any see me on the streets, don't be afraid because I wont eat you up .I can be friendly :) I will be who I am no matter what :)
Ah, idk what to type -.-

Dear heartbreaker,

If you know who you're, you know. I'm really sick and tired of everything of what you've put me on. I cant be the one always, putting up with all your cold shoulders and i can only put one fucking fake smile. It dont matter to you, it matter to me. Everything you once told me, is all lies. Why? Do you know how i feel ? Do you know the feeling when you tried your hardest but the person is treating you like a air? Im just doing everythiing on my own accord. You can forget me, you can. But why am i always tearing, worrying for someone who always forget me ? And allowing people who remember me and care for me to tear? I cant be this selfish.

In my entire life, no fucking guy dare to say this right in front of my face. Even if they do, they'll apologise. But instead, this anger and hatred overwhelmed me. If you do take me into your heart, you wont left me alone for entire day yesterday, YOU WONT. You're just doing everything to satisfy yourself. Im just a spare tyre, if you need me, you come over. But if you dont , you just lead your happy life. Dont you? Pretty right huh ? How have you been treating me, reflect. If we meant to be together, nothing tear us . Love is fragile but why i still love you.

How pathetic it is .

What am i now to you ? Not even a little care and just fuck me up. Upset enough, yet, you wont be there.. Im totally speechless till i could turn my phone off. I dont know what to talk. YES, IMMA CORWARD. FUCK LAH KAY. YOU DONT EVEN LEND ME A EAR WHEN I NEED 1 . INTSEAD, YOU IGNORED. you just let me hanging, crying, sad or upset. but it seems like, you wont want to go through with me.. seriously tired.... BYE.

I've nothing to say about day 2.  I decided to give it a miss.

Day 3 - Your parents.

Obviously , i love both my mother and father to the core. This is something i will never deny because , right at the bottom of my heart, i really feel that , they are the most important people in my life.

When i need them , they'll be there . When i've troubles, they'll read my mind. When im starving, they fed me. When im bored, they entertain me. When im sad, they'll console me. When i laugh, they laugh with me. When im outside, they'll worry for me. When i say i love mummy and daddy, they'll say, "more than you do".
When im young, i have nightmares, they came in to assure me. When im afraid to be alone, they'll keep me accompany. When im lazy to walk, they carry me. When im crossing the road, they held my hands. When i threw my tantrum, they never blamed me. When im doing anything, they'll be there to encourage and support me.
& now, They, guide me through my journey.

Ever since i turn 13 and 14, i changed. I admit, in secondary 1 till secondary 2 towards june, im not in good terms with my mother. Mummy, im sorry i made you worry, made you angry, made you upset. As for my dad, he didnt know how much i changed but , daddy , i know you care , i know you worry and i know you're very concern about me. Which parents dont? But of course, as time pass, i grew older and more sensible. Although i skipped school, my mother didnt abandon me.. So, i realised and during the holidays, mummy and i got closer. We share almost everything. Even little things that happened in our life. So is my dad. Thanks mummy and daddy. I love you 2 ! (L)

Day 1 - Your best friend.

Oh well, to be honest, Regina , Tania , Nimmy , J are people that i trusted the most. They care for me, accept me for who i am despite of my background. They never fail to be there when i needed a listening ear , console me when im down, lend me their shoulder when i need one. When im at my lowest point, they'll be there. When im lost, they will be there to find my heart and yes, open it as well. They're gift from god , true lasting friends perhap. Although i knew them 2 years or less, but after going through so much in my life, i know they're always the one. We share laughters and sorrows, experiencing everything together .

Especially ReginaTan.

She, the only one i called as bloodbond, best sister. I can really trust her, doing things together crazily , hanging out together as much as we could, confiding each other . She's 24/7 for me . She walked through with me all the obstacles, through thick and thin , ups and downs. I vividly remember how i knew her when im sec2. Is hysterical and epic but this doesnt matter because is about now. She knows me best , and she would go crazy with me in the public . Nothing tears our friendship apart ,  (Y) ! Thanks sister (L)!

Since my onsugar is rotting badly, i'll update here with the 30days letter. Boredom ~ Okay , next post , i'll post first one i suppose (:

Day 1 – your best friend.
Day 2 – your crush.
Day 3 – your parents.
Day 4 – your sibling.
Day 5 – your dreams.
Day 6 – a stranger.
Day 7 – your ex girlfriend.
Day 8 – your favorite internet friend.
Day 9 – someone you wish you could meet.
Day 10 – someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to.
Day 11 – a deceased person you wish you could talk to.
Day 12 – the person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain.
Day 13 – someone you wish could forgive you.
Day 14 – someone you’ve drifted away from.
Day 15 – the person you miss the most.
Day 16 – someone that’s not in your state/country.
Day 17 – someone from your childhood.
Day 18 – the person that you wish you could be.
Day 19 – someone that pesters your mind—good or bad.
Day 20 – the one that broke your heart the hardest.
Day 21 – someone you judged by their first impression.
Day 22 – someone you want to give a second chance to.
Day 23 – the last person you kissed.
Day 24 – the person that gave you your favorite memory.
Day 25 – the person you know that is going through the worst of times.
Day 26 – the last person you made a pinky promise to.
Day 27 – the friendliest person you knew for only one day.
Day 28 – someone that changed your life.
Day 29 – the person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to.
Day 30 – your reflection in the mirror.

I dont need such stuffs in my life. Whatever it takes, im just determine to carry on with my life. Exams are around the corner , i wanna study really hard. Leave me alone. Stop your nonsense. And please, get your family out of my life. Im tired of it. IM HAPPY WITH MY LIFE NOW. THANKS.

For everything it takes, im believing ,
For anything it goes, im letting it be.

Indeed.

I cant deny the fact of myself is a real sensitive person and i can really cry my heart out when i really get upset , depressed for all things include school , friendships , most of all , Relationship. I doubt anyone could even understand how i felt now ? I doubt so . I really wanna know , am i just a failure, loser or a pathetic shitz? I doubt i even exist in this world . I get so frustrated . SIGHZ. JUST FUCK IT .